Fetish, Kink & BDSM Counselling
Our counsellors understand that we were each born into an environment that had expectations around how we would engage with our curiosities, our fears, our desires, our selves, and others. When we initially experience interest in non-conventional sexual practices, interests and/or fantasies, we often experience distress, shame, judgement and feelings of disappointment. For some of us, these experiences are compounded by a lack of acceptance around our two-spirit, lesbian, gay, queer, transgender, and non-binary identities. At The Grounding Stone, we support folks with restrictive and sometimes traumatic histories in finding freedom in healthy and authentic expressions of their fetishes, kinks, and engagement in BDSM (bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism).
Our therapists often support folks in these areas:
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) - Fetish, Kink & BDSM Counselling
What is Fetish, Kink & BDSM Counselling?
Fetish, Kink & BDSM Counselling at The Grounding Stone is a type of talk therapy provided for and by people with varying experiences with and exposure to these expansive worlds. The therapy that we offer strives to provide a supportive space for people to explore the nuance of their experiences. Though we may share some community with one another, we all have individual experiences of our relationships and ways of relating in the world. Here at TheGS you are less likely to have to do the labor of explaining the general details around identity, relationship and experience which opens up opportunity to explore more expansively.
How do I know if I need Fetish, Kink & BDSM Counselling?
People approach counselling for a variety of reasons including seeking support around experiences of emotional distress, developing coping skills, finding more adaptable ways of being in relationship with self and others, and exploring ways to live more authentically.
What types of issues facing people engaging in some form of fetish, kink & BDSM do you help with?
At The Grounding Stone we work through an intersectional lens and understand that there are many different experiences within and practices of fetish, kink & BDSM. The systems that have informed our social identities and ways of being in the world impact our experiences and opportunities as individuals. Given this immense and diverse impact, we support folks around any and all of the ways that these experiences may manifest, including and not limited to identity, relationships, communication and personal growth.
What can I expect in my first Fetish, Kink & BDSM Counselling Session?
Each counsellor at The Grounding Stone has their own personal style and approach and it is in this first session that we will begin to establish our therapeutic relationship with you. During the first counselling session we strive to understand what motivated you to begin counselling, any relevant details about your life, and what changes or growth you are hoping to experience. It is okay if you do not have clarity on these pieces; we are here to support you on this journey from day one, and to help you to identify what may be helpful for you.
Is counselling confidential?
Yes, what we discuss in counselling is held in complete confidence as a part of our ethical practice as Registered Clinical Counsellors. There are 4 instances when we may be required to release certain pieces of information; these times are:
- When a minor is at risk of abuse or immediate harm
- When a client is in severe and imminent danger of harming themselves or others
- In a medical emergency
- When subpoenaed by a court of law
How many counselling sessions will it take for me to notice changes in my life?
There are a variety of factors that may influence when you may notice changes in your life as a result of counselling. Some of these factors may include your neuroindividuality, your readiness for change, your commitment to practicing the skills you learn in your counselling sessions in your day to day life (neurons that fire together, wire together), the systems of privilege or oppression that impact you, and the capacity that you have to focus on the work that you are doing in counselling. Some clients identify new ways of experiencing themselves after just a few sessions, and other clients experience noticeable change after several sessions over a longer period of time. We all have different neurotypes and we all move at different paces.
Can I talk about anything in counselling?
Yes, you may talk about anything in counselling. Some clients feel able to open up rather quickly, whereas some clients need more time to establish trust in the therapeutic relationship in order to feel comfortable “talking about anything”. At The Grounding Stone, we strive to move at the speed of relationship with you. It is quite a thing to discover the healing that can take place within ourselves when we are able to be with someone from whom we do not fear judgment. We have learned that when we are safe to speak our shame aloud, and to have it witnessed, we are then able to dismantle it, and to meet ourselves in a place of compassion and wholeness.
The only limits to confidentiality are as listed above in the “Is Counselling Confidential” Section.
What if I don’t know what to talk about or where to start?
It is okay if you do not have clarity on where to start or what to talk about; for some clients, this can feel overwhelming. We are here to support you on this journey from day one, and to help you to identify what may be helpful for you in this counselling journey. Some clients feel able to open up and identify what they are looking for support around rather quickly, whereas some clients need more time and support to orient and organize. It can take some time to establish trust in the therapeutic relationship, and at The Grounding Stone, we strive to move at the speed of relationship with you.
What type of therapists work at The Grounding Stone?
Our team at The Grounding Stone all have the designation of Registered Clinical Counsellor (RCC). An RCC is a professional counsellor who has completed a Master’s Degree and has met specific educational and training criteria that provide assurance of experience, qualifications, and stringent professional and ethical standards under the BC Association for Clinical Counsellors (BCACC).
Who do you work with at The Grounding Stone?
We are a virtual clinic and we provide phone and video counselling support to people who are 19+ and who currently live within “British Columbia”. We work with a wide variety of clients here at The Grounding Stone. We work with folks who identify within LGBTQ2S+ Communities, we work with folks who do not know or are exploring or changing how they identify, we work with folks who resist definition, and we work with folks who are struggling to understand the ways that loved ones identify. We have space for everyone at The Grounding Stone, which we believe contributes to a more cohesive and loving world.
Do you work with clients who do not practice or engage in some form of fetish, kink & BDSM?
Yes, we work with a wide variety of clients here at The Grounding Stone. We work with folks who do not know or are exploring or changing how they identify, we work with folks who resist definition, and we work with folks who are struggling to understand the ways that loved ones identify. We have space for everyone at The Grounding Stone, which we believe contributes to a more cohesive and loving world.
Do you offer virtual or phone sessions?
We offer both phone and video/online counselling for clients throughout all of “British Columbia” and we operate from within the unceded traditional territory of the Skwxwú7mesh Úxwumixw (Squamish), Xʷməθkʷəy̓əm (Musqueam), Səl̓ilwətaɁɬ təməxʷ (Tsleil-Waututh), Klahoose, Tla’amin, & Homalco Territory, and the K'ómoks Peoples.
How do I get started?
You may take a look at Our Counsellors page to see if there is a particular counsellor with whom you resonate, or you may simply send a message through our Contact Page sharing a bit about what you are looking for support around and we will match you with a counsellor who sounds like they may be a fit for you. You are also welcome to email us at connect@groundingstonehealing.com, or to phone or text us at 604.326.4325.
